The Hunt For Jock The Croc!

 Thursday June 22nd.

The Column 

The Croc.

And the Mummy-sounds like a bad joke.

    Finding ourselves at a bit of a loose end,El Presidente and myself decided to indulge in a serious game of 7TV involving Ancient Egyptian princesses,Adolf,Gene Hunt and Jock The Croc.Well,a bit serious.

Lady Winklepicker and the boys in blue.

Queen Nevertiti and her band of misfits.

             The game involved both sides hunting for various caches of loot one which was guarded by oor Jock.El Presidente’s forces consisted of previously mentioned Egyptian princess backed up by some of her minions (female of course)supplemented by Adolph and a few of his lackeys.My team consisted of Lady Agnes Winklepicker,head of the Tulips(The Unlady Like Internacional Pornographic Society-“We do things men just dream off!”)abeted or maybe hindered by Gene Hunt and his retinue minus Sam Tyler for some reason.

Adolph and the lackeys charge in.

Healy trying to make a name for herself.

Another success for the Aryans.

              Straight into action on my side was Heely Kawes hoping to earn some brownie points in front of Lady Winklepicker and an induction into the Tulips.This didn’t go down well for as soon as she picked up the first loot marker she was fired on by the Aryan lackeys taking a bullet wound for her troubles.This was followed up by one the lackeys taking her out permanently by cowardly charging her when she was down-Boo Hiss!Well at least she didn’t have to pay her subscription fees to the Tulips.

Queen Nevertiti doing an Adamson(skulking around).

The car park gunfight.

            Actually the rest of the game consisted of a big gunfight in the car park whilst Queen Nevertiti crept around the flying bullets looking for tasty loot bits and maybe new crocodile shoes courtesy of Jock who had other ideas mostly which sauce goes with Egyptian princesses.

Adolph goes down.

And gets up !

            It was obvious from the start of the gunfight the actual characters weren’t putting up a good showing as first Roy Carlsberg bit the dust and then Pc Annie Bananie went down.Sam will be p****d.This left the actual fisticuffs to the uniformed constables which they took to with much aplomb,ladling in to the ruffians with their truncheons,reaking revenge for their colleagues’ downfall.

An unusual confrontation.

            Meanwhile Nevertiti was skulking around the peripheries of the scrap, picking up loot caches on the way and setting her sights on Jock the Croc and her new shoes.Nevertiti’s bright yellow garb was spotted by Lady Winklepicker,’s ever alert eyes and after calling Gene to help her,headed off with Gene and her faithful mutt Jim in tow towards the crocodile pit and the inevitable last scene confrontation with the baddie.

Lady Winklepicker spies Nevertiti.

        The inevitable scrap in the car park between the local bobbies and Adolph eventually went the constabulary’s way but not before Adolph,wound and all had done some damage but not enough to stop him going down in a hail of blows from the police truncheons.

But her bodyguard runs interference.

           Jock the Croc was alerted to the sound of Nevertiti closing in on his pit and was about to set about her with his gnashers when she dazzled him with her bright yellow dress before dispatching him him with merciless cruelty,cackling as she plunged the centuries old dagger into his thrapple thinking to her self that she could also get a set of luggage out of poor Jock.

The final scene!

         Seeing this devious cruelty Lady Winklepicker doubled her efforts but found that she and her accomplices were confronted by Nevertiti’s minions barring the way to their beloved princess.Hunt went down in a salvo of arrows fired by the princess’s archer handmaidens leaving Lady Winklepicker and Jim the dog to face another of the handmaidens this time armed with a big sword.And I’m afraid this is where we left it due to the vagaries of the event cards.

     One day Lady Agnes Winklepicker will not leave us on tenterhooks about the story ending.

     My thanks to El Presidente for putting the game on at short notice.

    This has been a Garvald Film Studios Production.