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Friday, 8 May 2026

Shanghaied in Garvald

 Place-Somewhere in the Far East(Backlot of the Garvald Film Studios)

Time-Sometime in the 1920’s(About Half past Seven)

Herr O’Brien on a good day.




       First game in a wee while saw me venturing into the realms of Back of Beyond and a six man skirmish between various factions as we had a full house at the dacha of El Presidente with people attending from as far away as Billsquarry in West Lothian which really is Back of Beyond country.

The Turks Turn Up.

Oor Andrew’s late arriving Tibetans.

My Chinese Carry Oots.

In attendance were of course El Presidente,myself and various miscreants including Chief Skulker Donald,Comrade Gilchrist and Herr O’Brien.As usual Oor Andrew was at the coo’s tail meaning he was left with the last remaining army whether he liked it or not.On a first come first served basis I chose the Chinese faction and for some reason Donald picked the Red Russians and Comrade Gilchristi chose the White Russians.Very much against the grain.El Presidente chose the Turks before Herr O’Brien proved true to form and picked the Mad Baron leaving Andrew with the Tibetans.Each faction came complete with its own building which were secondary objectives with the 2 religious buildings in the middle of the table being the main objectives.Rules used for all you serious gamers was The Men Who Would Be Kings with a few variations. 

The Tibetan Yurt.

My wee home from home.

The Mosque In Question.

                  We played a turn before heading to the pub for our customary beer and pizza break and immediately I was assailed in the flank by Comrade Gilchristi due to him randomly being dealt the first turn card. The object of his desires were my Chow Mein squad who found themselves literally with their backs to the wall being waylaid by a squad of White Russian infantry and after they took a few casualties insult was added to injury by the Russian machine gun taking a few more.My plan had been to indulge in a 3 way plan with defending against the said White Russians,sprinting to capture the mosque whilst assaulting Andrew’s Tibetan stronghold with my Borscht Russian mercenary cavalry but once again my fantastic battle plan lasted to the first shot.

You don’t see many horses on the fourth floor.

My Russian resisters.

“Who needs a vest on!”

        Comrade Gilchristi’s other forces headed towards Donald’s Reds ensconced in the corner of the table hoping for a two way victory but Donald was having nothing of it.Herr O’Brien started his assault on El Presidente who was situated like myself in the middle of the table so he would be involved in a 2 way struggle with Donald and Herr O’Brien so again like myself he would be assaulted quickly on both sides.After the first round of sparring we all traipsed off to the hostelry where we were joined by some of our erstwhile spouses and also Oor Andrew.

Here come the Russians.

Chief Skulkers Leather Clad Railway Workers.

El Presidente pondering.

        After being suitably refreshed we plonked ourselves back around the table and began our usual evening of bickering,name calling and the usual terrible dice rolling.Andrew assumed command of the Tibetans and immediately placed one of his cavalry units within charging range of my Borscht cavalry and with usual niaveness charged in to them  making them retreat only to find myself within range of his infantry which he had placed in his home building.Lo and behold one took a few hits depleting them even more giving Andrew’s cavalry to charge back into my Borscht cavalry who instantly turned into Borscht. The only saving grace was that El Presidente had introduced a rule which meant that we could bring back the first unit that was eliminated..Voila!Another unit of Borscht cavalry .

In we go!

The Tibetan Command Squad.

Trying to do away with the Tibetan Cavalry-Part 2.

    My machine gun gun deployed and was given the task of protecting my left flank from the incursions of the White Russians but it was looking like a Forlorn Hope but it would keep the Russian wolf from my back door and give me the chance to have my Hoisin squad leg it towards the Mosque objective and the chance of some much needed victory points.On the other side of the playing field El Presidente was indulging in a two way struggle between the evil Red Russians led by Chief Skulker and Herr O’Brien with his Mongol festooned cavalry supplemented by some Japanese and Chinese infantry infantry-obviously the unrighteous Chinese.

The Turks rushing to the church service.

Japanese sailors being used as cannon fodder.

Bringing some religion to the fight.

         My Russian cavalry lasted about as long as their predecessors which was about thirty seconds as once again my cavalry were decimated by Oor Andrew’s infantry and cavalry combination.My Hoisin squad had eventually reached the semi safety of the Mosque but no sooner had they dug in when they were attacked by the cowardly Tibetans who in turn were being used as cannon fodder by the evil Mad Baron’s army. The remainder of Oor Andrew’s army after waylaying my innocent lads turned his attention towards the Mad Baron’s forces who didn’t seem to be doing a lot apert from his cannon which seemed to be sniping away rather successfully against the Tibetans who came complete with their own squad of warrior monks who after squaring up against the Mongol cavalry decided to change tack and head for the already occupied mosque hoping to dislodge my Hoisin squad.

Mongols against Tibetans with a load of horses.

Now monks against Mongols.

Shooting at the reds.

     My Chinese Chow Mein squad meanwhile had been trading shots with the Tibetans shooting from the comfort of their own yurt.My Chow Mein squad decided that discretion was the best part of valour and advanced to the rear towards their own howf hopefully to receive the benefit of some defence.That they did but it just started a tit for tat shooting match with the ensconced Tibetans and my casualties were rising a bit more than the Tibetans.

The monks trying to get into the mosque.

The railway workers advance.

Russians and Russians.

        After an initial rebuff of the Tibetans from their assault on the mosque,they found themselves to being assaulted in the rear by Mad Baron’s Chinese infantry who after successfully chasing off the Tibetans turned their rifles on my Chinese church goers making them leave the premises and their last show of defiance was to stick the finger up at the the new inhabitants.

The remnants of the Hoisin squad being evicted from the mosque.

Comrade Gilchristi’s White Cavalry oot for a trot.

The traitorous Chinese entering the mosque.

     On the other side of the pitch El Presidente had made a mad dash towards the christian church in the middle of the playing field in order to bag a few late points.That was the game over and after divvying up the points Herr O’Brien was found to be the winner of the.A good game played by one and all even allowing for the backstabbing but where would a Wednesday Garvald evening without it.All scenery,scenario and figures were provided from the collection of El Presidente.

       See You All When I See You.


Monday, 9 February 2026

German Efficiency In Darkest Africa

 Place-The African Jungle(Garvald Film Studios Backlot)

Dateline-Sometime in the 1890’s(About 7.30).



          Tonight’s entertainment found us back in yonder times with a ripping yarn involving a lot of spear armed warriors against German Mausers.The spears came of second best which since Herr O’Brien was my opponent it gave me a great chance for revenge as this time he wasn’t armed with tanks and big guns just assegai spears,shields and some rubbish dice rolling. The game should have also involved Italians and Belgians but Oor Andrew was otherwise engaged workwise so El Presidente took charge of the rule checking as we hadn’t used Chris Peer’s Death In The Dark Continent rules for a long time.

My big gun sounding the off.

Looking confident.

Keeping the goodies to the rear.

Watching each other’s backs.

           My objective was to get my bearers across the table to safety whilst Herr O’Brien’s objective was kill,kill,kill.This proved obvious for as soon as the whistle went he was charging into my proud warriors who just happened to be female archers who blunted the attack by firing a salvo of arrows into the approaching rabble doing away with a lot of them in the process.This didn’t stop the charge as Herr O’Brien’s Masai warriors continued their charge and massacred my girls to a girl.My Ngoni warriors immediately saw this and after taking stock charged in and sought revenge.They ended up bouncing off each other and withdrew slightly from each other to take stock.

Deadly ostriches-they once killed a Belgian officer in a previous game.

Rampaging Elephant.

My Igoni.

Backed up by the ladies.

    This was to be the norm for the rest of the evening as my plan was to lure Herr O’Brien’s natives into the range of my rifles and use rifle and Maxim gun fire to stop him in his tracks as he didn’t have any missile weapons of any sort to reply with.Oh revenge was sweet.He didn’t help himself as he continuously rolled terrible dice rolls whereas my dice rolling for once couldn’t be faulted.

The girls inflicting damage on the Masai.

Well that’s dinner taken care off.

Reminds me of an old rugby song.

The lions definitely weren’t sleeping tonight.

   My natives kept up their momentum and were proving to be the pawns I needed to stifle Herr O’Brien’s charges. I did have to reorganise my defences occasionally so that they faced the Masai charges and this my Junge did well as they were able to cause casualties with just about every salvo.

A giraffe ignoring the gunfire whilst chomping a tree.

A non participating rhino.

My girl’s dwindling the Masai.

Standing Tall.

          Desperation was kicking in for Herr O’Brien as he threw everything at me for a last hurrah but German determination saw my colonists through to the end without a scratch and also the benefit of one remaining native unit. I am sure there will be plenty of volunteers to fill the ranks am Morgen.

Protecting dinner.

More excellent German shielding.

Looks ominous-only for the Masai.

Readying to finish the Masai off.

        A great game especially if you were the German player but it would have been good to see the Italians and Portugeuse on the field but alas.

The unused Belgians.

Likewise the unused Italians.

        All figures,scenery and scenario provided by El Presidente. 

        This has been Garvald Film Studio Production all the way from East Africa.